Final Warning to the Imaginary Party Regarding Public Space

Article the first
Public space is intended for the exchange and circulation of commodities. Like all other commodities, people may move about freely within it.

Article 2
Public space is space that belongs to no one. What belongs to no one belongs to the State. The State grants to commodity semiocracy the occupation of said space.

Article 3
Offices are made for working in. The beach is made for tanning on. Those who desire entertainment have leisure spaces, discotheques and other amusement parks set up for such purpose. In libraries there are books. In hospices there are old folks. In stadiums there are families. Life is made up of detachable moments. Every moment in its proper place. Everything is in order. No one complains.

Article 3 bis.
Disorder also has its own special function. It fits back into the Whole, in the place pre-established for unforeseen events. For the well-being of all, citizens are invited to enter the public way during festivals organized for their attention, at regular intervals, by service teams under the charge of the Ministry of the Interior and the Ministry of Culture. Our ambiance agents are there to serve you. And you could be nice to them, you know, even if you are under their rule; that's not forbidden.

Article 4
Every child is assigned an adult-in-charge. That adult is responsible before the law for the behavior of the child attributed to him or her. Because of their still-incomplete psycho-social training, and in the interest of their proper development, children are not to play in public space without surveillance from their assigned adults-in-charge. In any case, children are classed into two groups: hyperactive ones, who receive Ritalin, and hypo-active ones, who are to be put on Prozac.

Article 5
In the interest of preserving the landscape and respecting the social environment, bodies not conforming with the ruling aesthetic/sanitary norms, as published daily in the national press, will please refrain from circulating in public areas between the hours of nine a.m. and eight thirty p.m. During this time period, however, beggars will be tolerated during the hours of greatest affluence, when they will participate in the common edification of all, by the repulsive example they constitute.

Article 6
The purpose of life is happiness. Happiness is an objective datum measurable in exact quantities. These days everyone knows: where there's transparency, there's happiness; those who don't seek to show themselves off are just trying to hide, and everything that tries to hide must be considered suspect. Consequently, it is the duty of Biopower to intervene and help make all the opacity in our lives disappear. Biopower wants you to be happy. And if it must, it will want it in spite of you.

Article 7
For everyone's safety, public space must be kept entirely under surveillance. Where control is still imperfect, the masses are invited to please keep to themselves all behavior contrary to human dignity. All anonymous gatherings and all abnormal behavior should be reported to the nearest Preventive Surveillance Action (PSA) patrol. Denouncing agents of the Imaginary Party in our midst is the duty of all citizens; do it for your own good and for the good of all.

Article 8
Public space is neutral space, meaning that therein, all manifestations of singular existence mean an attack on the integrity of others. All available resources are now to be put to work -- urban furniture, suitable decors, Continual Control Monitoring (CCM), etc. -- to render impossible such demonstrations and the intolerable nuisance they cause to our fellow citizens.

Article 9
We thank all those who have contributed by their good behavior to making these principles go without saying.

Article 10
NOTHING IS EVER TO HAPPEN AGAIN.

changed April 24, 2010